Stuff You See on the Road...

Here's something thing that drives me nuts. People that say, "No matter how I feel about someone if they were broken down on the side of the road I'd help them". Oh really? How long have you been working at AAA for? Do you own a tow truck? Are a rogue vigilante that drives around the mean streets looking for a case of a flat tire or a dead car battery? Do you have a side kick in a tower in a tow yard that alerts you to the next instance of a Honda stuck in a ditch?

I drive down the road everyday and see people broken down on the road around 3-5 times a week. You know what I do? I bet it's the same thing most of you people do. Especially at 4AM since you don't want to explain why you are trying to be a contributing member to society with alcohol on your breath since you couldn't turn down those last 5 oyster shooters from that mixed race chick with the big tits and fuck me eyes.

I KEEP THE FUCK ON DRIVING!!!!

You know why?

I DON'T KNOW THAT MOTHERFUCKER!!!!

For all I know that could be next craigslist killer that is looking for some practice before starting up a GMail account. You know? A little pre-maiming?

That's why I stopped working for AAA. I wasn't getting paid enough to risk getting murdered.

Another thing that grates my mind like its being raped with a salted pineapple. What the fuck is with people buying dogs? I don't get it. I see stray dogs on the road all the fucking time. FREE DOGS. On the road all the time. Yet people go to pounds and farms and other pet boutiques to spend money on a dog.

That would be like me being a in a bar filled with chicks. HOT CHICKS. All of them are walking around with recent STD results in hand and shirts saying, "FREE PUSSY" while also yelling, "FREE PUSSY!!" like it's peanuts at a baseball game. 

"FREE PUSSY HERE. GOT SOME FREE PUSSY HERE. SHAVED PUSSY, BLACK PUSSY, LATIN PUSSY, MIXED RACE PUSSY FOR ALL YOUR PROGRESSIVE PEOPLE. 

ALL THE FREE, HOT, DISEASE FREE, NO STRINGS ATTACHED PUSSY that you'd want.

For the ladies just imagine this bar is also filled with nude Channing Tatum clones with raging 12 inch erections while giving you those seductive bad boy eyes. He's ready to drill your pussy like he wants to put a ring on it.

You are in this awesome place. You pull out your wallet. Count your money and say to yourself, "Ehh..I'd rather go buy some pussy (or cock) at the whore house."

If you want a dog go get one off the street.