Milk, Honey, and Black Shit

Milk, Honey, and Black Shit:

It's funny how Christians describe Heaven. You know? They say it is the land of Milk and Honey; Milk and Honey. Isn't that basically two ingredients short of an order at Starbucks? In order to complete the order you would need some black shit; i.e. coffee. This requirement has not changed ever since I became aware of it, it's always been the land of milk and honey; but no black shit. Kind of makes you wonder the fate Martin Luther King Jr. doesn't it?

 

 MLK: "Hello St. Peter. I got shot in the head and now I'm here."

St. Peter: "Yeah-------about that."

MLK: "What do you mean about that?"

St. Peter: "Well I don't know why the milk and honey people were letting you preach about Christianity and judging by one's character but there was some fine print on this whole heaven thing,"

MLK: "What fine print? I though you just had to be a good person and believe in Jesus."

St. Peter: "Yeah-------you do but---- It's also the land of milk and honey. Not the land of Milk, Honey, and Black shit. There is another place that allows all three though."

MLK: "Oh, where's that?"

St. Peter: "Starbucks; technically it wont be open for a couple decades but we have that whole time travel thing down pat so it's not an issue for us."

MLK: "I mean are all my friends and family there?"

St. Peter: "Yes, all the black shit goes to Starbucks. Besides you don't want to go in Heaven anyway. It's nothing but white people shit with their milk and honey. The only one that has actually found a loop hole is Nelson Mandela because he scared the white shit out of them; a little bit. Honestly he just went in to knock up some of their women to make heaven more beige to maybe allow for some black shit in the future via an executive order."

MLK: "Oh----well I don't want to be violent;---- I guess---- I'll take the Starbucks option."

St. Peter: "Cool, we just have to wait for the Starbucks bus. I'd say you could take the milk and honey bus but they'd make you ride in the back according to their corporate black shit guidelines. Rosa Parks raised a huge fit about it."

 

 

I guess what I'm saying is fuck Heaven; go to Starbucks..........